Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
