Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
