yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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