chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Randomize
