WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
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