I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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