So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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