another moral hangover. fuck.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
