we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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