ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
