so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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