Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Randomize
