Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize