Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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