That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
