Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(440): View more from Ohio

Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."

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(901): View more from Tennessee

oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass

(901): View more from Tennessee

fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings

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(631): View more from New York

there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me

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(402): View more from Nebraska

You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.

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(305): View more from Florida

Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.

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(512): View more from Texas

The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen

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(765): View more from Indiana

You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house

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