She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
