Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
