I never want to see another naked old woman again.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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