I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
