Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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