Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
