I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
