found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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