in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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