im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
