Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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