69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
It's blow job season.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Randomize
