I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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