just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
