she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
