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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  My liver just broke up with me...

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms

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• (505): View more from New Mexico

  Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park

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• (530): View more from California

  I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  How does one acquire holy water?

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  Did we just second hand smoke crack?

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