I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
