I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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