Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
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