Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
