# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize