i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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