Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
