So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
