dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I didn't notice because vodka
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
