Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
