4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
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I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
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Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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