Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
