maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
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She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
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She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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