I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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