I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
It's just like the Real World with babies
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
