we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
