Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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