Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
