who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
