Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
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